Reviews for Coffee Station

04/12/2024 - MenuPix User

02/02/2024 - MenuPix User

08/18/2011 - Bob
My fiancee grew up right down the street from here and now we live one town over. She always loved it growing up, and we figured we'd head over for breakfast.

It was, without a doubt, the WORST breakfast ever. First off, it was incredibly crowded (WHY????) and there was nowhere to park and nowhere to wait for a table since the place is so crammed full of tacky, tacky, tacky junk. We elbowed our way through the crowd of slack-jawed mouth-breathers and made it to the counter. I was soon presented with a cup of nearly transparent, almost luke-warm (possibly tepid... is tepid colder than luke-warm?) liquid that tasted like charcoal. Apparently, it was "coffee" but I could barely recognize it as such. The surly waitress immediately demanded our order and left in a huff when we explained that we weren't quite ready (hadn't even had a chance to open the menu).

Eventually, Queen Cranky returned and I ordered their combo-breakfast thing (two eggs, over easy, two pancakes, bacon, homefries). I will say this, it arrived very quickly. I only wish it hadn't, then I would have lived a little more of my life before subjecting myself to the horror they presented before me. It looked tasty enough, except they apparently never clean their pans or flat-top. My eggs, which were horribly overdone, and like everything else, cold, tasted like cinnamon. I assume french toast or something had been made on the same surface that my eggs were. The rest was worse. My cold, dry, gummy pancakes tasted like fish, as did my cold, mushy homefries. The "bacon" was two tiny shriveled strips that I can't imagine was ever actually part of a pig. God, it was awful. Please, I beg you all, don't go here. I don't know why it's so popular. This was my second trip (first to the new location) and after the mediocre experience I had before, I don't know why I returned. The crowd and the staff looked like a bunch of Jerry Springer rejects. Some emo grease-smear kept emerging from the kitchen to sneer at the rest of the bottom-feeders. The "cutesy" decor is nauseating. And it was raining. The rain wasn't, technically, the Coffee Station's fault, but if they had the power to make a meal even less pleasant, I'm sure they would have.