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Additional Dining Info
Accepts Credit Cards
Good for Kids
$ - Cheap Eats (Under $10)
$$ - Moderate ($11-$25)
$$$ - Expensive ($25-$50)
$$$$ - Very Pricey (Over $50)
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Top Reviews of Hotdog Heaven
2.5 stars - Based on 8 reviews
06/29/2015 - Jesus Navarro
I'm in Chicago a lot and I love me some Chicago weiners. I decided to try Hotdog Heaven and boy was I in for a rough night. First off, the guy, who I assumed was the owner or manager, seemed like a real dipstick. He was very loud and acted like an angry Muppet. He kind of looked like one with his big head. This kid could not stop chewing gum and to top it off, he wouldn't keep his mouth closed and it sounded like a hungry baby sucking on his momma's tit. When I asked him politely to not drop his gum in my dog, the kid for agitated and I thought I was going to have to knock his ass out. I almost walked out, but I was super hungry. I kept getting a strange whiff of something, too. I thought the smell was maybe some old sauer kraut, but I noticed it only happened when this kid would move past me. When he gave me my two dogs, I realized this silly nitwit had nasty BO. I wanted to vomit. Now on to the food. That hotdog tasted like what I would imagine an old, wet, moldy dog turd. I tried to power through the first dog, but when I started to dry heave so I decided enough was enough. I bailed that place because the whole thing was making me nauseous. That was the beginning of my nightmare. Halfway home my guts started aching. I started hearing noises coming from my stomach that sounded like gremlins having a party. By the time I got to my house I was about have a volcanic eruption out of my ass. My wife met me at the door and according to my wife I ended up screaming some gibberish that my wife said sounded like a retarded Romanian girl trying to eat a shaved apple with no hands. I Heisman trophied my wife into the wall to fight my way to my toilet. I could feel what felt like warm mud leaping from my anus. I knew I would have to burn my trousers after the war was done. The gurgling turned into a banshee howl and then came the explosion from hell with all is demons. The force was so great that I swear I lost most of the water in the bowl. I could hear my wife mumbling the rosary between explosive eruptions from my bowels as she rounded up the kids to leave. She said something about quarantining me in the house and then the front door slammed. I think the first round lasted for an hour and somewhere along the line I blacked out only to wake in the fetal position on my bathroom floor with crap explosions against the wall and tears streaming from my eyes. The wall looked like Jackson Pollock's "Magnum Opus" made from buckets of bloody stool. This went on for the rest of the night and by the time it was done I felt like an Auschwitz survivor. My wife sent the fire department, but they refused to enter the premises until the infectious disease unit had cleared the scene. Needless to say my anus was shredded and I'm pretty sure I lost several feet of small intestines in the battle. The second time I ate there was even worse.
03/17/2014 - marty reyes
The food was fine, I guess, reminded me of the hot dogs you get from Quick Trip. They should try to do Sonoran dogs. The proprietor, seemed loquacious, and gregarious, that is until he said I "smelled pretty". I don't want to give you the wrong impression, I was actually flattered, but it seemed inappropriate to say the least. Heck give it a try, even if it is only to get a highly disgusting, strange,and inappropriate compliments ;)
07/18/2009 - G. Dalder
This place is no longer in business.
12/23/2008 - Mike
I had high hopes for my first visit to Hot Dog Heaven but it quickly turned into Hot Dog Hell! The owner was shocked when I asked him how he could possibly charge for an extra pickle slice to add to his skimpy toppings. He became threatening when I told him I had worked for years in that type of business and NEVER charged a nickel for such a request. He also berated his employee right in front of the few customers that were actually there. I felt embarassed for the employee especially when I found out that the employee was his father!
As for the hot dog....it was cold and undercooked.
The few people that I found who had also gone there said that the owner was a young, under-experienced knucklehead.
Do yourselves a favor and avoid this establishment!
4 reviews with an average rating of 4.0 stars have been consolidated because they have only ratings and no comments.
However, consolidated reviews are
included in the calculation of the average rating of 2.5 stars which is based on 8 total reviews.